Ships At Sea

The wistful lament of the under-invested and overly-wrought is often:

“Just wait ‘til my ship comes in!”

However, we need to face up to the fact, here and now, that BIG SHIPS do not sail into small ponds with small docks … never mind wading pools! 

And the great ships of life are not loaded with everything one could ever want or need or dream about.  They’re merely loaded with opportunity, with which we actually have to DO something.  Opportunity is merely a DIY project waiting to be engaged. 

And the biggest opportunity shipping lanes are farthest out in the deepest water. 

To access the ships of biggest opportunity, we have some options:

1.    You could swim the full distance … which would take a tremendous amount of preparatory conditioning, exhausting engagement, discipline and persistence; 

2.    You could build a raft or a boat [i.e., build a portfolio of sturdy credentials] that would assure safe navigation of the tides and waves you will encounter;

3.    You could pool resources with others – develop a “flotilla” of associates gunning for deep water Goals and Dreams;

4.    You could “sell your soul” to someone else more likely to hit the jackpot of opportunity and ride out to THEIR ship on THEIR coattails;

5.    You could gradually grow and build capacity from opportunities found on smaller boats to those available on larger boats to the ship-sized opportunities that fit best the capacities you’ve grown.  [NOTE: Temporary and entry-level jobs are a great way to begin this preferred navigational option.  The key here is GROW and BUILD and MOVE UP – and keep growing and building for the duration!]

Ships are always on the move and their cargo is constantly changing.  We need to be always on the move and upgrading our cargo, as well.  Target a ship – a DREAM – that you won’t mind CHANGING WITH … one with the gravitas of durable engagement and sustainable enterprise.  [Hint: The most seaworthy “Boats Afloat” contain things people really need:  People will always need to be fed; they will always need shelter; they will need clean water and waste management; they will need transportation; they will need to be inspired; they will need to be educated; they will need medical care; they will need ways of handling their finances; they will need to be entertained; they will need elderly care; and they will need end-of-life resolution.]

Keep building and growing and capacitizing yourself, and keep making the most of every opportunity within the scope of your vision to go deep water navigating.  Stay fixed on the horizon to find the biggest ships [aka the biggest DREAMS] you can fathom.  Then engage them for all you’re worth.  Quartermaster 

Agreements

The book The Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz contains the following advice:

1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don’t take anything personally.
3. Don’t make assumptions.
4. Always do your best.

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

Some of us could add our own personal “Agreements” that work best for us.  But what works best for us – for our own “personal freedom” – has to work as well for the significant others in our lives … family, co-workers, service staff, neighbors, etc., as well as for civilization at large! 

The main point is that we should all make agreements that matter… that pave the way forward, not backward … and stick to them. “Agreements” and resolutions are similar in some regards.  But the “or else” for agreements is much more consequential to BOTH ourselves AND others, whereas the “or else” for resolutions, tends to be mainly for more personal purposes.  Accountability is the main goal.   

What triggered this entry was somewhat mundane ... a “Situational Agreement”:

Dinnertime included some of the best cornbread muffins I’d ever made.  [FYI Cracker Barrel: they were blushingly good!]  But I had made enough for about 3-4 meals.  As I loaded up my favorite beans & rice to go with the cornbread, I decided I needed to make an “Agreement” with myself that two muffins would be sufficient accessories to complete the meal.  To fulfill the “Agreement”, I had to pace myself and make sure the two muffins stretched the full distance of the meal.  How nice and affirming it was to see the “Agreement” being kept, while knowing there were at least 3 more meals worth of muffins to look forward to! 

The Four Agreements highlighted by Ruiz cover much of the territory required for full-bore navigation in life.  [Implied, of course, are a lot more explicit things like “Don’t do stupid stuff!”, “Eat your vegetables!” and “Keep your powder dry!”]

But we can make more explicit situational agreements on a day-to-day / moment-to-moment basis … like making our lists and checking them twice, eating only one or two corn muffins at a time, cleaning up after ourselves, making the dreaded phone calls, finishing the day’s spreadsheets, lending a helping hand to at least one person each day, smiling more than we frown, getting our exercise, limiting our “vegetative”/”Zoned Out”/mind-numbing time, etc. 

When you are inclined to think “Somebody should DO something about THAT!”, one “Agreement” is that the thought should immediately boomerang to “Why not ME?”  That’s the beginning of self-awareness/self-efficacy and “Agency”; it’s the beginning of ownership; it’s the beginning of leadership; and it’s the beginning of moving on up.  One of my personal Situational Agreements is that I take shopping carts from the parking lot of grocery stores INTO the store when I’m doing my shopping.  It costs me nothing and makes the experience a zero-sum game.  

Whatever “Agreements” will best float your boat toward more auspicious, more sustainable sailing need to be inked in.  Any suggested “Agreements” that would interfere with smooth sailing need to be summarily dismissed. 

What started this was food.  Food provides an illustrative backdrop metaphor for “getting and keeping our act together”.  With this in mind, I was struck by the recent uproar around the “Whole 30 Diet”.  The basic idea is as follows:

“Those who participate in the program for 30 days cook their own meals and quash their bad-food cravings, which forces you to think differently about food.  By saying ‘no’ to nearly everything that is bad for you, you learn that food shouldn’t rule your life … It’s really liberating.”

[One can’t really help wondering: Why would anybody EVER … knowingly … do things that are “bad” for them – except that it makes us feel like we’re beating the system, getting away with something, and/or exercising our personal license to cheat on ourselves while indulging?]

“‘Don’t you dare tell us this is hard,’ write the creators of Whole 30.  ‘Quitting heroin is hard.  Beating cancer is hard.  Drinking your coffee black.  Is.  Not.  Hard.’  Worst case, you hate it ... It’s like my ballet teacher used to say at exactly the wrong moment: ‘It builds character.’”   Sarah Blaskovich

https://www.dallasnews.com/life/healthy-living/2018/01/01/7-practical-tips-surviving-whole-30-diet

But there is one more Agreement to be made if we are inclined and determined to make a difference in the world: 

“If you want to change the world,

start off by making your bed.”

Admiral William H McRaven

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esoQKkFQoIQ

The rest will follow in due course, of course, because you will already have agreed to play the game full-out with new and more sanctionable “Terms of Agreement” … and you will already have pounded the first stake in the ground.  May yours be a spectacular run, with no-holds-barred, and no regrets.  [P.S.: I’ve agreed to get some exercise, so now I’ve gotta go out and make that happen!]  Quartermaster

Beauty Personified

Except for a relatively small number of misanthropes, humans are social beings who seek affirmation, authentication and legitimization from others.  We like being “Special” … being loved. 

We also seek out BEAUTY in each other and want to associate most with those who are most attractive … however we define it … as long as WE are included in that circle. 

However, most of us have one or more “Achilles Heels” of imperfection which we try to hide or for which we try to compensate in some way to make ourselves more attractive … more “associable”.  We’d love to have “knock-out” attraction!  The evidence is unassailable:  

Annual revenue of the cosmetics industry in 2017 was just short of $57 billion.

https://www.statisticbrain.com/cosmetic-industry-statistics/

This does not include cosmetic surgery, cosmetic dentistry, manicures, pedicures and other “procedures” or unfathomable “beautification” dollars accrued by the fashion industry or nutriceuticals or weight-management programs, never mind hair care.  

Forbes estimates the earnings from all sources of “beauty industry” engagement, including “cottage industry” involvement of mom-and-pop businesses, to be $445 billion and growing!  (How many Mary Kay entrepreneurs do you know personally?)

https://www.forbes.com/forbes/welcome/?toURL=https://www.forbes.com/sites/chloesorvino/2017/05/18/self-made-women-wealth-beauty-gold-mine/&refURL=https://www.google.com/&referrer=https://www.google.com/  

So “beauty” – more generally “attractiveness” – is a BIG DEAL! 

But what about those of us who are “ugly ducklings” and “sow’s ears” and who don’t happen to have our share of $445 billion lying around to help move ourselves into the “IN Crowd”? 

The book Wonder by R.J. Palacio is a good reference here.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11387515-wonder

NOTE: Social media has overwhelmingly exacerbated the problem – or the opportunity, depending how you look at it! 

Beauty aside, the “flip-side” of attraction is the tendency to see unfamiliar others as “threatening”.  This tendency arises from evolved tribalism … from the inclination to “stick to one’s own kind” where we find the greatest security in family and close friends to the exclusion of others.  In fact, “tribalism” tends to maintain itself through constant reinforcement of the threat from outside “others”.  This tendency is currently – and very effectively – driving extreme political polarization.

At some point, our definition of “beauty” has to be reconciled with the fact that cosmetics and the unconditional love found in tribal associations won’t take us the full distance to our most coveted and sustainable Destiny – certainly a growing challenge in an expanding global universe.  Beauty and unconditional love may open doors, but neither has the required gravitas of durable grounding. 

Did you ever pause to wonder why some of the most “beautiful” people are married to some of the most “plain” or “ordinary” individuals – MARRIED, indeed!?  Yes, some cases may merely be contrivances involving money or influence.  But there is often an unseen attraction – a “hidden beauty” involved that is much stronger than skin-deep infatuation. 

So where do we turn to make ourselves more attractive to significant others if we don’t fit the standard “mold” of socially-defined beauty and can’t make it so by contrivances and machinations? 

The first suggestion is to become useful!  Become a notable problem-solver and a true difference-maker and you will find more than a fair share of attention from folks who matter. 

Other currencies of “beauty within” – in addition to rock-solid competence – that hold potable water include:

Respect … Generosity … Self-Confidence … Discipline … Being a “Go To Person” … Humility … Befriending the Less Fortunate … Sense of Humor / Being able to laugh at yourself and your own foibles … Not Blaming Others … Doing Your Homework / Being Prepared … Being Accountable … Being Trustworthy … Sharing … Caring … Being Non-Threatening … Being “Interesting” / Adventurous / Balanced / Knowledgeable / Curious / A “Seeker” / A “Fighter” … for Justice, Fairness, Equal Opportunity

Find the beauty in science, and science will reveal its secrets!

Find the beauty in medicine, and medicine will doubly reward you!

Find the beauty in literature, and literature will give you enlightenment!

NOTE: “Inner beauty” is inextricably associated with and derives its legitimacy from “being comfortable in one’s own skin” … hving a clear understanding of “who we are” and where we are going … with some reasonable level of confidence that we can get there.  Having the light from a Dream or Goal or Purpose or Mission that is larger than us shine through the prism of our core being creates unique and incomparable beauty. 

“Beauty is when [you know ‘who you are’ and] you can appreciate yourself. When you love yourself [ -- your entire ‘identity’], that's when you're most beautiful.” Zoe Kravitz

“People are like stained - glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

“I think every person has their own identity and beauty. Everyone being different is what is really beautiful. If we were all the same, it would be boring.” Tila Tequila

“True beauty is in the music that you and the universe make together.  The more your instrumentation is integrated into and in tune with the symphonic vibes of the universe, the truer and more vibrant your beauty will become.”   P. Questmaster

Articulation

ar·tic·u·la·tion

noun

LANGUAGE

the formation of clear and distinct sounds in speech.

"the articulation of vowels and consonants"

MUSIC

clarity in the production of successive notes.

"beautifully polished articulation from the violins"

https://www.google.com/search?q=articulation+definition&oq=articulation&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0l5.3817j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

ARCHITECTURE

distinctiveness of both structural/functional

and cosmetic/ornamental features

comprising a whole

LIFE

…

Articulation implies some level of carefully constructed complexity and/or deconstructed perplexity,  with “everything in its place” … nothing missing and nothing wasted.  Each syllable in perspicacious language and living has meaning, purpose and weight.  It implies propriety, efficiency, austerity, clarity, completeness – no slurring or slippage.  It also implies “carving out”, as in separating or purifying or creatively and innovatively bringing about something new or better … higher, more aspirational.  There is also an implication of intentionality in articulation. 

Personal note: Much of my personal life has been an amalgamation … a “singularity” of merging eating, sleeping, working, playing, etc., all running together.  At least that’s what is looks like!  I have papers overflowing on my desk – including tax documents, books to be read, notes to be codified, contacts to be contacted, etc.  But it’s rather like mining for aluminum in a city dump instead of in diverse remote locations … at least a large part of the “rendering” process from raw material has been circumvented! 

Speaking of city dumps …, I still tend to amalgamate my mashed potatoes, stuffing, sweet potatoes, green beans and cranberry sauce during holiday feasts! 

My laboratory – in my most productive science days – was similarly “amalgamated” to the uninitiated beholder.  However, I had a very clear mental articulation of what was where, and every critical process had its place and associated accoutrements readily available in situ for maximum efficiency of operation.  Nonetheless, cell culture operations were meticulously articulated in their own right for sterility and technical purity purposes.  And the lab notebooks were meticulously articulated!

What I have found in my more “seasoned” years is that regimented articulation (i.e., more intentional than “habit”) can add both intrinsic and aesthetic value.

When you visit someone else’s home, it’s the articulation you most do or do not appreciate: If things are orderly (as in the case where the person(s) being visited were expecting company), outfitted and spaced “in good taste” – with some degree of intentionality and forethought – clean and neat, it creates a much more pleasant experience than if everything – including dust bunnies and all of one’s “hoardings” – is “amalgamated”.    

Why do we like to go shopping and acquire “new” stuff?  Because of both the articulation in the stores … with everything attractively displayed, clean and neat … and the articulation of new merchandise … separated from everything on the “cutting room floor” :: and separated from sweat, dust, gravy, make-up, tears, snags, dents, scrapes, fading, wrinkles, clothes hanger creases, etc.

Why do we like to eat out?  You guessed it!  Articulation!!  (You fill in the blanks!)

Here we stop to ponder the contrasting images at the top of this offering – the exquisitely articulated mansion outfitted for the holidays versus the bland, neutral, “practical” neighborhood hovel … with everything blanketed in a single color.  (One virtue in the latter case is that the house was just newly painted, covering up a lot of errant articulations of peeling and discolored paint, rust, loose siding, etc.) 

Disclosure: I have a personal aversion to painted brick architecture – particularly to brickwork painted in a way that disarticulates it from surrounding building materials.  Bricks have intrinsic gravitas and should be allowed that distinction! 

Note that errant articulations and disarticulations can cause a lot of angst, stress and discombobulation well beyond their immediate in situ conjunctivation.  A bad hip can do significant damage to one’s back and knees, not to mention one’s “disposition”. 

We can become much better “disposed” by giving more attention to articulation. 

Finally, the importance of clearly articulating what you want and need – and can do without – cannot be overstated.  And WHY!   Remember, it’s got to be purposeful, like you really mean it. 

And re-articulate frequently.  Life requires continuous sculpting, carving the best YOU and your PATH OF DESTINY out of a vast universe of possibilities … moment-to-moment.  Like Michelangelo, create the most vibrant/elegant life-track vision you can conceive – not that you can fit comfortably into but that you can GROW into.  Here’s to a Grand New Year of Grand New Articulations!   Quartermaster