Failure

Failure is an inextricable part of life … a companion element of success in a well-rewarded life and a “signature” element of an unrewarded life.  The difference in outcome – other than the difference in rewards – is ultimate satisfaction versus chronic regret. 

At some point, we’re going to fail.  So we might as well learn to deal with it!   If you’re going to attempt to rise above “average”, you’re very likely going to fail A LOT.  Those with a lack of familiarity with failure – i.e., those for whom early life is unchallenging – face doubtful prospects ahead.  http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/18/magazine/what-if-the-secret-to-success-is-failure.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

How do we define “failure”? 

“Failure can be differentially perceived from the viewpoints of different evaluators. A person who is only interested in the final outcome of an activity would consider it to be an Outcome Failure if the core issue has not been resolved or a core need is not met. A failure can also be a process failure whereby, although the activity is completed successfully, a person may still feel dissatisfied if the underlying process is perceived to be below expected standard or benchmark.  Three major failure deficiencies are noted:

1.    Failure to anticipate

2.    Failure to perceive

3.    Failure to carry out a task”

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Failure 

In his TED Talk (Nov. 2011), Larry Smith lays out ten reasons “Why You Will Fail to Have A Great Career”  He opens his talk by, first, underscoring the canonical concept that Great Success is primarily based on doggedly following one’s PASSION:[https://www.ted.com/talks/larry_smith_why_you_will_fail_to_have_a_great_career]

The “reasons” he adamantly refers to as “excuses” include the following:

1. Many of those who actually – finally – “find their passion” don’t actually DO anything about it … they merely like “having” it and admiring it;
2. Many feel that Great careers are a matter of luck; if a Great career happens to them, they’re one of the lucky ones; if it doesn’t, they’re not; and if a Great career doesn’t happen, they can always “fall back” into a “Good” career … (which, Smith points out, will definitely NOT happen because “Good Careers” aren’t really available any more.)  
3. A Great career requires GENIUS … and that doesn’t include me (see also #5);
4. I am competent.  Competence gets things done and carries its own reward.  (Yes, but it doesn’t get you the “Brass Ring”!)
5. Successful people are weird.  I’m not weird … I’m not a “Geek” … I’m not abnormal … ; I’m kind and pleasant and a “Team Player”;
6. I’m not POWER HUNGRY … I don’t need the trappings of Greatness;
7. The mantra I learned from my parents is that if I work hard I can have a good career, and if I work even harder I can have a Great career.  (However, evidence shows that working harder only draws the burden of MORE work, not Greatness);
8. Most people haven’t explored enough options to have identified THEIR OWN unquenchable passion.  They can identify things that are “interesting” and things that they “love”, but not that ONE thing whose pursuit will carry them through all the barriers, burdens and micro-failures they will need to overcome to reach Greatness;
9. Many fear the concept of Destiny.  Pursuit of one’s Destiny narrows the playing field and requires extraordinary, unwavering focus and dedication;
10. ‘I am not willing to sacrifice human relationships (i.e., “family”) on the alter of Greatness.’  This excuse uses “family” – particularly children – as a trumped-up shield against the need for total commitment and the prospect of failure.
11. Smith references the Stanford Commencement speech given by Steven Jobs in 2011 as a “primer” illustrating many of the above points.http://www.businessinsider.com/the-full-text-of-steve-jobs-stanford-commencement-speech-2011-10

How you view and respond to failure is really important. 

Many quit.  Some grow and become stronger.  Some change direction or focus.  A select few view overcoming failure as the next most worthy challenge. 

Here’s one pilgrim’s manifesto on failure: 

“If I fail, let it not be for lack of PASSION

                                    …….. of PRESENCE

                                    ......... of PURPOSE

                                    ......... of VISION

                                    ……. of COURAGE

                                    ......... of CARING

                                    ……. of INITIATIVE

                                    ......... of PREPARATION

                                    ......... of KNOWLEDGE &UNDERSTANDING

                                    ......... of EXPERIENCE

                                    ......... of TIME

                                    ......... of EFFORT

                                    ......... of CREATIVE ENTERPRISE

                                    ......... of PERSISTENCE

                                    ......... of ENGAGEMENT with SIGNIFICANT OTHERS

                                    ......... of  ‘FEELING LIKE DOING IT’

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

If I fail at any one thing ^__ or at ten or a hundred ^__

let it be wisdom’s quarry for an even greater success to come.” 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“If men could regard the events of their lives with more open minds,

they would frequently discover that they did not really desire

the thing they failed to obtain.”

André Maurois 

"The brick walls are not there to keep us out;

the brick walls are there to give us a chance

to show how badly we want something."
Randy Pausch