Manageability II

OK, let’s face it:

Most of the things that make life more “manageable” range from boring to downright unpleasant: 

·         Picking up after ourselves

·         Doing the laundry

·         Making the bed

·         Loading and unloading the dishwasher

·         Studying / Preparing a presentation

·         Grocery shopping

·         Preparing meals

·         Getting our exercise

·         Flossing

·         Getting up in the morning

·         Turning off the TV

·         Changing the filters on the furnace

·         Mowing the lawn

·         Walking the dog / cleaning the kitty litter box

·         Making the requisite phone calls

·         Practicing and perfecting our art (piano, guitar, vocal, painting, pottering, … )

·         Getting organized … and reorganized

Then there’s parenting, spouse time and extended family obligations …  

Is there any “manageable” way through it all?    

“That’s life!  Suck it up!!”

Taskmaster

“Onward through the fog!”

Henriette Seiterle

However, it doesn’t have to be all gloom and doom … and fog!  The way we view things makes a world of difference.  If we view all the stuff that makes life more manageable as burdens, then burdens they will surely be.  And it will always be a struggle to do burdensome things.

It’s a lot tougher to do what’s “good” for us than it is to do what “pleases” us.

But turn the kaleidoscope just a bit to get an alternative view and perhaps try a novel approach: 

1.    Make a game out of doing the necessities.  Above all, don’t make mountains out of mole hills – don’t make things look or seem more difficult than they really are.  Experiment with different ways of making the obligatories more efficient – or even perfecting the process or results ... making them both more interesting, efficient/effective and rewarding.  

2.    Try doing different things at different times of the day, either between more pressing engagements (i.e., for “therapy” plus a welcome reprieve) or at less pressing times (i.e., when you can more legitimately go into regenerative, “recovery” and reset mode). 

NOTE 1: It’s tempting, particularly for the OCD, to just get the unpleasant, mindless, chores out of the way up front and clear the way for more productive and rewarding activity.  It does work.  However, it’s been found that “sandwiching” mindless, low intensity activities between more demanding engagements provides valuable decompression and gear-changing latitude.  For those adept at multi-tasking, “sandwiching” provides a opportunities for strategic planning, problem solving, elimination of “writer’s block”, etc.  (Make a list!) 

NOTE 2: The physiology of the human being is not necessarily “primed” for tackling big rocks right out of the gate, and reluctantly doing unpleasantries doesn’t help.  Light exercise is sometimes the most expeditious way to quiet spurious “frazzles” and get the physiology adjusted for full engagement.  The person who can find ways to make exercise an integral part of doing chores has a great advantage!   

3.    Designate a specific “Time Out” … preferably when nothing more important or more pleasant is likely to happen or is allowed to interfere.  And maybe once-a-week or once-a-month is OK rather than once-a-day for some things.   

4.    Think of executing manageability necessities as “Powering UP”.  After all, you’re making life more manageable!  Seriously, if whatever you’re doing isn’t making life more manageable, maybe you really shouldn’t be doing whatever that is.    

5.    Engage in Productive/Instructive Self Talk.  Instructively guide the child within – the one who just wants to play and experience immediate gratification – about what it is you’re doing and WHY.  “We’re going to clean up the kitchen now so we’ll have clean dishes for the next meal … so we’ll be able to find what we need when we need it next … so we’ll not be stuck later dealing with ‘caked on’ residuals … and so we’ll avoid unnecessary microbial invasion, ants, mice, etc.“   

6.    Consider necessities as “Core Activities”.  Embrace the necessary!  You’re going to have to do what you have to do.  But you can even make life easier and more manageable by doing patently unnecessary things – like packing your lunch the night before!  Wow!  Who does that? 

7.    Be circumspect about non-binding virtual “obligations”.  “My friends/family/work associates ‘need’ me to do … ‘expect’ me to do … (instead of making my world more manageable.)“  Or not!  In terms of your engagement, others “need” most for you to have your act together.  They certainly don’t “need” you to go drinking, to movies, mall hopping, Tweeting and Twittering – else they are, themselves, too needy.  One can’t be governed by presumed “needs” of others.  NOTE: There could be an underlying insecurity here that begs some reflection: Do I need unreasonable reassurance of acceptance from my family/friends/associates, such that I have to be constantly at their beck and call?   If they expect so, that’s their problem, not mine! 

8.    Finally, just DO IT and don’t think about it!  Make at least some essentials a mindless, thoughtless exercise while you’re thinking about something else.  Put on your iPod earphones or invest in some Google Glass to surf the net while vacuuming, doing the dishes, preparing meals, etc., or do some quiet time high level problem solving.

SPECIAL NOTE:

For maximum "manageability", start big and more challenging projects early.  Big projects need a head start.  They need  incubation and “simmering”.  They require a substantial degree of ground work to get the boulders out of the way.  They need visioning and revisioning.  And they need collaborative engagement.  Building in contingencies and “Second Chances” up front is what consistent “Winners” do.   

 

Prepare to thrive!  Whatever else you do, be assertive in making life more manageable.     Quartermaster