"None
of you is special.
You are not
special.
You are
not exceptional."
David
McCullough, teacher, addressing Wellesley High School graduates
June 2012
The worst part is that we are advertently and
unapologetically lulled into thinking “the world is our oyster” by life,
itself:
We come into the world under
extremely artificial circumstances, sheltered on all sides, above and below from
all the vicissitudes of life. We immediately
become the center of doting attention from parents and extended family. By around age 1, we learn to walk by
ourselves. Whoa! By age 2, we learn to control the external
world with the word “No!”, not to mention the effectiveness of whining and
tantrums. From ages 5 through 18, we are
automatically advanced in school – with gratuitous grade inflation along the
way. With plenty of food in-sourced from
all over the planet, we grow bigger, stronger and our bodies mature. By age 16, we’re deemed of age to drive an
automobile. By age 18, we’re deemed
sufficiently matriculated to graduate high school. And at age 21 – official “drinking age”, we
are declared independent adults … “Captains of our own Destiny” … answerable
only to the beat of our own drum.
Wow! Is life wonderful, or
what!?!
By the time reality sets in, the stakes have reached just
short of unmanageable heights – if we’re lucky.
“There’s an important gap between
illusion and reality.
It’s only a matter of time until reality takes
over.”
John Bogle
Here’s how it’s supposed to work:
With the imposition of such untenable expectations, the
unperturbed moment becomes our sanctuary, over which we deign to exercise
absolute sovereignty. “Free time” is
ours for the making and taking, because …, well …, because it’s one of the few
things, overall, that we can declare is truly OURS!
Which brings us to the second troubling truth: Unscheduled time is not now and never was, in
fact, “Free Time”. Unscheduled time
is the best opportunity we will ever have to invest in our own wellbeing.
“Time is God’s way of keeping everything from happening at once.”
(Source Unknown)
Blow that opportunity and we can kiss our fondest Dreams
goodbye.
The final correlative hidden truth here is that the stakes
keep getting higher. There are no
parking lots. There is no “arrival
terminal”. We are expected not only to
carry our own weight (self-coaching) with progressively increasing
responsibility, but to contribute back toward the societal investment required
for succeeding generations ... keeping in mind that there’s a stiff
thermodynamic tax off the top of whatever we put in, not counting Murphy’s Law,
missteps, misfortunes or whatever Fate has in store along the way.
So Life’s Tough! And
it’s particularly so if we insist on carrying forward our own unfounded
assumptions and unrealistic expectations acquired early in the going.
“The way most of us prepare for life is akin to packing shorts and a
T-shirt
for what is more like a polar expedition.”
Poster at Quartermaster’s
Headquarters
The good news is that thousands of generations have survived
life’s vicissitudes, and countless individuals have, in fact, thrived, despite both
the odds and the challenges. And, while
toughness can be learned and acquired as necessary, the real substance of
success is simply raising our sights and selves above an artificial dependence
on societal subsidies to become all that we CAN be. Life does not require more of us than we can
deliver. Quartermaster
“There is only so much you can do, but you have to do that much.”
Garrison Keillor, on Prairie
Home Companion
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